These are some of the questions that swirl through the mind of a growing teenager. Most importantly, they all wonder, “what age should you have sex?”
This post teaches what you should know about the right age to become sexually involved.
What is the best age for you to have sex for the first time?
According to experts, a teenager should be 18 years before having sex and they have several theories to prove this.
In fact, these reasons have nothing to do with customs, beliefs, and traditions, but rather, center on scientific facts.
In other words, scientists have proven how sex can affect you physically and emotionally.
Why males should not have sex before 18 years
Boys go through puberty at roughly the same period as their female counterparts do. However, their bodies undergo different transformations during this period.
At the onset of puberty, males’ testosterone levels increase, and they begin to perceive physical differences in their bodies.
This is the age at which they begin to understand the concept of erections.
Boys’ emotional development is less developed than females, sometimes even after puberty, which occurs between 9 and 15 years.
As a result, they may make rash judgments concerning sexual relations. At that point, they only think of having sex, probably because of what they have heard and are curious about the act.
Sometimes, boys do so because of the changes they’re experiencing in their bodies, ignoring the mental implications of their actions.
Most times, boys begin to comprehend the full implication of sex at a later age. This, unfortunately, could cause regrets, especially when their sexual decisions were wrong.
Therefore, it is best for a male to wait till they hit 18 before considering sexual relations.
Why females should not have sex before 18 years
On the other hand, female development differs significantly from that of male development. Every day, their bodies undergo a variety of changes that can have an impact on their mood at times.
Having sexual relations after the age of 18 is the best time for women because their bodies are more mature.
At a younger age, their bodies are not prepared to go through a significant hormonal transformation.
Women who have sexual relations before the age of 17 are likely to be depressed than women who do after 17. Another thing to note is the emotional quotient of women is larger than that of men at any given age.
This isn’t because women are supposed to be soft; rather, it’s because women’s bodies are naturally shaped in this manner.
Therefore, sex before the age of 18 can carry a far greater mental burden for women than it does for men.
Other factors that determine the right age to have sex
- The maturity level of the Individual: The maturity of an individual determines if they are ready to engage in sexual relations. This could be before or after the age of 18. In some cases, some individuals have a broader mental capacity at a younger age than their older counterparts. In the same vein, we find supposed adults who have the same maturity level as a child. Therefore, a girl of 18 could have sex and handle it perfectly well while another girl of 21 might not.
- Gender differences: Males and females are not the same. While both parties experience puberty at the same age, females grow faster mentally. Thus, they might be able to handle the implications of sexual intercourse more than males of the same age.
- Emotional development: A teenager’s emotional health plays a significant role in making sexual decisions. One thing is certain, sex could come with certain responsibilities which might be more emotional than physical. An emotionally immature person might not handle the aftermath of sex. Some might end up being emotionally hurt, which could lead to other complications.
- Orientation: This should be one of the most significant factors that determine if a person is ready to have sex or otherwise. A child who grows in an environment where sex is an open topic will have a different opinion of sex compared to someone from a different environment.
Sexual orientation starts from the home. Every family paints a different picture of sex. Some might believe that sex is a forbidden act until marriage, while others might not.
The same thing applies to religion. A person who is dedicated to a certain religion tends to believe what that religion says about sex.
Some religion bans the use of the word ‘sex.’ Unfortunately, this leads to poor orientation of the act, which could lead the person to make mistakes unintentionally.
How do you know when you’re ready to have sex?
Sex is an intimate act, therefore, it is one that you should not rush into. You must be certain that it is what you want to do at that point in your life.
However, you might think that it is only teenagers who have to wonder about the right time to have sex. But this also applies to adults, especially when they are starting with a new partner.
Before engaging in sex, ensure that you would be comfortable with the act. Pressure should never be your reason for sex. Start by asking yourself certain questions.
Do I feel comfortable with the idea? Do I feel pressured to have sex? Am I emotionally ready for sex?
Trust in your partner
Do you trust your partner? Are you confident that he or she is someone that has your interests at heart? Having sex for the first time could be a big deal, especially for females.
As a result, there tend to be emotional attachments to the person you’re involved with. Thus, you should ensure your partner is someone you can comfortably speak to about your opinions on sex.
You should be comfortable speaking about sex
If you cannot stand any topic that relates to sex, then you’re not ready to have sex.
You should be able to communicate about sexual ideas, ask questions, make research, and speak to experienced individuals about sex.
Once you’ve gotten to that level, then you might consider the act.
Are you of legal age to consent to sex?
This should be your priority before getting into bed with someone. The age of consent varies in several parts of the world.
For instance, some countries set 18 years as the perfect age of consent, while others set it for 16 years.
If you’re below the age of consent, you should not engage in sexual activities. This is because you don’t have the power to consent or refuse.
If this happens, your partner will suffer legal consequences.
Why should teenagers wait for the right time to have sex?
As a teenager, you are under a lot of pressure to have sex. Besides, your peers and everyone around you are doing it.
You hear stories of their escapades and want to be part of the cliche. However, rushing into sex can come at a very high price.
Your peers will present sex as fun, which could be true, but several risks come with it. Most times, you are not ready to deal with these consequences and they could have negative impacts on your life.
First, you might have sex with a person who might not be as committed to you as you are to them. Therefore, you are more vulnerable to heartbreak and depression.
While getting your feelings hurt might not sound like a big deal, you should also consider the health implications.
Sex opens you to the risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases like gonorrhea, syphilis, and others.
Aside from this, it increases the chances of unwanted pregnancy in girls, which could lead to other complications.
Teenage pregnancy would cause the female to drop out of school, feel depressed, and embarrassed.
The father (if a teen) has to go through several emotional strains as he’s not ready to handle such responsibility.
Therefore, before engaging in sex, ensure that it is something you want to do. You should also be ready to take responsibility for your actions.
If you can’t, then it’s best to put a hold on it till you’re confident and ready.